Thursday, December 31, 2015

2015 In Memory

Same time last year, I would have just finished watching Iron Man and headed to bed, heavily pregnant with Sofiyah. Earlier in the day I spent my time at the office finalizing a few things before the new year break. Today, however, I decided to take leave and spent time with my family & finished off planning for 2016 at my parents instead. 

2015 has been a great year for me simply because I have had Sofiyah. She was a wonderful baby! She's adorable, never really fussy, and she is simply so bright - truly, she is the light of my life. She had started walking 2 weeks ago and now she wanders around everywhere like there's no tomorrow :-P If ever I were given a choice, I would have chosen to have her all over again :-)

But life in 2015 had been more than cute and adorable. We had finally tried to settle down in Seremban proper. In fact, come August this year, it's only our first anniversary at our humble abode in Seremban. Truth be told, we have another room full of boxes. But I couldn't really care less anymore, as long as we manage to get everyone to school, daycare and work and back safely, then that would be it for the time being.

Late September, my home was broken into while we were away in Sungai Petani visiting friends. It was an adventurous weekend indeed! I am still trying to report it in detail here. We lost the MyVi car and a 42-inch TV. Alhamdulillah, despite all odds, the police found our TV, safe and sound in November somewhere in Nilai and later earlier this month our car was found too, also in Nilai. We took back the TV, but have decided earlier on to forgo the car and simply claim the insurance.

In between, those months, we somehow manage to:

1) Visit Legoland and Kittytown some time in November during the Deepavali break

2) Revisit Sungai Petani with the girls so as to really catch up with Etty, since the September's visit was cut short due to the break-in.

3) Went along with Luqman's PASTI excursion. There's this place called Farm in the City somewhere in Puchong that we would not have known existed had we not follow the trip. And there's that Beryls Factory too, where I borong chocolates and cookies like nuts ;-)

And of course, I have done many first in my lifetime in 2015, including:

1) I was given the responsibility to lead a department sometime in June, I'm still learning at it. Sometimes, I am struggling, some other time, I think it's not too bad.

2) I received the '"Ibu Contoh" Award for having  fully breastfeeding Sofiyah exclusively for the first 6 months of her life time from the Hospital Tuanku Jaafar, Seremban. After 4 children, and the struggles in learning how to breastfeed all 4 of them, this award and how I was chosen was totally unexpected. But I was happy nevertheless to receive such appreciation, Alhamdulillah indeed :-)

3) I brought a student's trip to the Parliament. That's actually my first time planning it all. I thought it was alright. Not to mention - my former classmate is currently the LA for the Parliament, so I got to catch up there too :-)

4) I took the ETS for the first time when heading home from SP to Seremban for my revisit to SP. It was comfortable and reliable in terms of its efficiency. In fact it took only about 5 hours from SP to Seremban.

5) I finally manage to watch the National Symphony Orchestra play in Istana Budaya. Even better they were playing all the favourite movie themes, including Star Wars with Stephen Rahman Hughes and Jaclyn Victor as guest vocals for the night.

So, despite my grandfather's passing and also my aunt's husband sudden passing too this year, I think I have had many first in my life which I have managed to try to achieve in 2015. Next year, would be me focusing more on my academic activities. Ways of improvements in seeking knowledge and more networking and cooperation to plan on achieving more academic writing. I think if Sofiyah is cooperative, and I am more patient, there will be more proper writings and teaching innovations in 2016, In Sya Allah. Please pray I lead myself to the right path. Ameen.

Saturday, December 26, 2015

UiTM Rembau & UiTM Dengkil

I have been busy.

I wish whatever I deal with on a daily basis could be self written. 

Ohh maybe I just need a stenographer haha..

Anyway, here are some pictures of the upcoming UiTM Rembau that would be ready next year (mid or late 2016) and UiTM Dengkil which has already started its operation as the Pusat Asasi for UiTM. I went to Rembau on the 6th of December & Dengkil on the 17th of December.

I went scouting for both places to evaluate their distances from 'civilization' for future 'encounters'. I must admit that since I have set my eyes on Seremban 3 (since I am already there anyway), both campuses don't seem to be very appealing to me. If I were to move again next, I am moving my house postcode closer to no 50000. And that's that.

UiTM Rembau's grounds seem to cover a larger area than UiTM Seremban, however it will cater for less students due to the size of the buildings. I think from the stage of the construction, it will be definitely ready in 2016. In the near future, convocation ceremonies for all UiTM Negeri Sembilan students will be conducted here. The campus is somewhere in the middle of some palm oil plantation (more like middle of nowhere). However, it is located only about 10 minutes away from the Pedas/Linggi Toll exit. From Pedas to Senawang/Seremban, exit to exit is about 20-25 minutes.

As for UiTM Dengkil, it's only about 5 minutes away from Pekan Dengkil and 10 minutes to the back entrance of Putrajaya. In fact one can see the PICC building from the campus' grounds.  It caters for capacity of 5000 students.  All Asasi students for Science, Engineering, Law & TESL will be studying here. It's a beautiful campus. But part of its (outside) surrounding are still third party's constructions sites, complete with some sort of water 'lombong'. The management will need to be dealing with some of the health and security concerns due to the campus' surroundings in the near future, on top of dealing with the 'business-minded' concessionaires. In fact, UiTM Rembau too will have their own health & security issues considering their location, although it will be more of a nature sort of issues; mostly animals - monkeys, snakes, wild boar, not to mention insects and pests. So, coming from someone who've had to deal with PFI campus a few months this year, I wish both campuses - all the very best! ;-) 

Thursday, December 24, 2015

To boss or Not

These past couple of days had me thinking -

It's not easy being a boss, even if it's only for a small team. The hardest part is actually managing people of different characters and ‘catering’ to their different perspectives & expectations. At times, I simply shake my head in my mind & almost say it out aloud - "mcm ni punya org pun ada ka?"

My good friends told me I have it in me to be a good boss, and most times I actually doubt them haha... I just don't like to be someone who decides things for others. I used to do things because it's part of my responsibilities, my boss rarely need to order me up or check on me. So I thought when I'm the boss, that's how everyone should be? Right? So how hard could it be? Right? Then....I am in for the shock of my life. Yeahh I was a bit naïve, I know.

I think the difficult part for me is to understand the differences in people’s motivations in my line of work. Some have great passion for the job, the ones that soldier on, regardless of what the institution throws at them, and there are some others who are not even sure why they are here in the first place, and then there are some of the worst kinds: the selfish ones. I have met & dealt with my fair share of selfish people in my lifetime, but every time I encounter new ones, it never fails to amaze me at how oblivious they are of the fact that they are so self-absorbed. But then again if they are aware, they would have a different conscience.

While most people in this profession tries to be conscientious, they try not to, not so much for their inability to do so, but simply because they feel even if they did, it grants them nothing in exchange. In their life dictionary, in order for a certain act or task to get done, there must be a reciprocal reward, an exchange of value - for them. Or else, they are the ones that have been intimidated and bullied. They would claim that the institution is not worthy of them. However, when the table turns, they have no qualms in asking for something, reaping from others, not realizing that they themselves have turned into bullies too. 

The test is – how do I get this kind of people to ‘move’, getting them to achieve their fullest potential despite the limitations and constraints of the institution. It’s going to be tough. People never change unless they wanted to. The only person I am capable of changing is myself. If I am finding it difficult to be firm for fear of offending others before, then I have to learn to be firm regardless. If I am finding that they are taking me for a ride because of my niceties, then I will continue being nice but fair to all. If I am finding myself flabbergasted when they questioned any of my decisions, then I will remain steadfast unless there are any justifications or other solutions in changing those decisions. Sometimes, it had to be done. There’s no other way around it. 

My initial mistake as a boss was to think that everyone should be more like myself. Mostly, that’s not going to happen. I need to really take in this role as a manager of my team and improve as one, even if at times I feel that there are just too many things I still needed to learn on the job, not only as a team manager but also as an academic. So I will take on this role as an Amanah and challenge myself to be better at it. In Sya Allah, when the time comes for me to leave, I will leave a better team for my institution.

And oh, yes...I am leaving. Leaving what, or where to, remains under consideration :-)        

Monday, November 2, 2015

Selamat Jalan Abah We

I met him last, at the end of September in a family function in Ayer Keroh. Before I left, I hugged and kissed him as I usually did as of late. You know at his age you never know when we will last meet. It could be that I may meet my maker even sooner than him. But we all knew, that every single day of his life then was a bonus. I went home to Tg Bidara for every single family function that I could this year, especially considering the short distance from Seremban. In fact, I was there every other month. I would have been back even more had it not for all my other family responsibilities and work commitments.  

It had been 5 lonely years for him since my grandmother passed away. But he soldiered on. He celebrated his 91st birthday last February. It was the first time he ever had a cake or even had a somewhat 'formal' birthday celebration. We all rallied around him and made him cut the cake and actually pose for photos afterwards. He was happy. We were too.   

Last Thursday, was the last time family members could actually hear him talk. He had a bad cough, a fever and difficulty breathing. He suffered a cardiac arrest while seeking treatment in a clinic with my uncle on Friday and was sent to hospital for further treatment. The whole family gathered and waited while he was under observation. Come midnight Saturday morning, he passed away in his sedated condition peacefully. Innalilahiwainnailaihiraji'un...

He definitely had 91 years of colourful life. He's the epitome of a traditional Lelaki Melayu Terakhir, strict, no nonsense man, whom adhered to a patriarch role to the core. But he's also witty, kind-hearted and very involved and on top of everything for his family. He's a very handsome man, reaching almost 7 feet tall. If he was born in this era, he would have been cast as a fashion model :-)

But that's not what made him the man that he is. He will be sorely missed for being the man that took good care of his family and protected them safely in an era where those who lived in kampung remained uneducated, future uncertain. For someone born in the 20s, he was as educated as anyone who was raised in the city can be. I was actually amazed at how intelligent he was considering the era, time and place he was raised. He fought for what he believed was right and stand true to his principles till the rest of his life.

Hari ini aku bangun daripada tidur dan teringat akan hari-hari terakhir bersamamu ini Abah We. Terasa suatu kehilangan yang aku tidak dapat kugambarkan :-(. Mungkin masa akan mengubat duka dan luka ini. Setiap kami bersedih dengan cara kami sendiri, tapi aku mahu kau tahu, tidak ada hati yang tidak terkesan dengan pemergianmu. Kami semua sayang Abah, seperti mana kami semua cintakan Mak. Semoga Abah dapat bertemu kembali Mak di sana nanti. 

Abah We tercinta, selamat jalan. Semoga rohmu dicucuri RahmatNya dan tergolong bersama orang-orang yang beriman. Sampaikan salam kami kepada Mak. Suatu hari nanti kami susuli dan In Sya Allah kita semua bakal bertemu kembali di Syurga Firdausi. Ameen. 

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Kau dan aku

Mimpi kita tak sama,
Walau jiwa serupa,
Biar apapun daya,
Hidup kita berbeda.

#hakikatnya kita di pinggir kerinduan yang sama, namun rasa itu hilang entah di mana

kembali kita di titik mula yang lalu, bermula semula dengan harapan yang baru menjelma...

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Students, the law and love

It was a serious disciplinary case. The police was involved and the student's parents stayed back wondering about his future in the university. At one point in time the mother was saying something along the line - 'with the case, gone are the chance for him to get a job with the government'.

My heart sank, thinking - it's 2015 and parents still carry these kind of mentality, that the best bet for their children's future is by them securing a job with the government. They reminded me of my mom. But my mom was born in the 50s and raised through 60s and 70s, where such mentality is rife. My mom worked as a civil servant for 38 years, servicing various departments & ministries, and experienced the good and the bad of life as one. 5 of us currently serve as civil servants either with the government or statutory bodies. And I dare say, 2 of my siblings were highly encouraged by her. I, myself chose my line of profession first, before I chose where I planned on serving. Eventually I joined a Public University after a short stint with a semi private one.

I would have thought that time have changed and such tendencies have long gone now. But I guess I was wrong. The future of your children does not lie with the government nor does it lie with anyone else. And for god-sake, it's not the only future for them.

What made me feel even worst then, was thinking that, the student's mother has such thought coming across her mind - worried about his chance of getting a job with the government - rather than wondering why the boy had been involved in such illegal activities.

I am not a counselor, but I told the parents that his actions are all symptomatic of something even bigger. They need to sit down together and talk about it. They agreed with me, but I'm not sure whether they see what I see. They looked at loss with what's happening and there I was sitting through it all praying that I will never be in their position. I need to learn from all of this and avoid it from ever happening. I need to make sure my children and my students turn into useful, beneficial kind of people to others.

I noticed something missing in their relationship with their children. There's this connection or bond that they don't have. It's not the first time I'm seeing it. It seems to pop up over and over again with many other serious disciplinary cases that I've gone through before. The students had no real bond with their parents.  It seems like their only connection to their parents are merely biological. It's disheartening. Made me wanna run home and hugs & kisses all my children till they suffocated.

I pray I will never forget. That's one reason I continued dealing with students disciplinary cases. Some students, through these cases are still able to be saved, some remained as a lesson for me. Some students took disciplinary actions and changed for the better. Some are even my former students. Every time I met them, I made sure they will never forget that they are not to return to any disciplinary hearing in the future. They took it in jest, but I know they got me loud and clear. There are some that we have to let go. From time to time, I highlight these issues in class, although I do wonder whether any of them actually stick. Well, at least some discussions do become a reminder of sorts, as can be seen here

Anyway, it can be frustrating and exhausting at times. But the fight must go on. In fact, I started the month, sitting in a 2 days Seminar with the Uni's PUU himself, Emeritus Prof Shad and the rest of the gang from all over Malaysia, sieving through all the issues involved when dealing with the law and its application for the campus and the system as a whole. It was enlightening, it was fun meeting former colleagues, friends and new ones. We had a great sharing session for 2 days and I think most of us appreciate the support given to us by the whole PPUU team and hope to have a better working experience together in the future. 

Prof Shad in his parting text, note the following:
"It was such a privilege to host all of the Campus LAs. My most sincere thanks to all of you. I pray that your campuses grow in quality and strength and you grow with them in your career. I will carry warm memories of this meeting. Till we meet again. May God keep you in the palms of his hands."

Ameen & most welcome to him and his team, and many thanks too. Similar prayer apply to everyone, In Sya Allah. :-)

Prof Shad while giving his Opening Speech

In the meantime, somewhere in Shah Alam....

This girl and her siblings were busy ransacking their hotel room :-P
P/S: I have been busy you see...I am sorry for the one liner post or even the title post only. It started off that I had wanted to block the date for the post, but eventually I got carried away by many other things, so I did not finish up my writing. Many excuses, of course hihi...

So I promise to update on these two posts Adventurous Weekend & Packed August soon. In Sya Allah.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Adventurous Weekend

It was supposed to be a weekend trip away to Sungai Petani visiting good friends, especially my friend Etty. He lost his husband last November suddenly, and I was too heavily pregnant with Sofiyah to go for a visit. So after so many postponement on my part, I have finally managed to get everyone into the car for the trip one weekend.

We left later in the day on the 18th September, spent the night in El-Zehraa in SP and off to meet Etty the next morning.

I have only been sitting around having breakfast at her place, when suddenly my DH rushed back into Etty's house after leaving for the laundry services around Bandar Laguna Merbok. He said some students were trying to reach him and reporting that our house's gate and door have been left wide open and they suspected that somebody had broken into it. They also claimed the car was no longer there. There I was thinking - oh ok, luckily no ones home when the break ins happened, Alhamdulillah. That was such a relieve.

Anyway, it was almost Zohor then on the 19th of September. So we waited for Zohor and rushed home by 2.00 pm. In the meantime, Abah dropped by the house and took some photos to ease some of our concerns in regards to what have been missing. I am only worried of two things - the photos of the baby and the children in all of our electronic devices left at home and also my jewelries. The location of the jewelries seems untouched, so that's one less loss on our part. So I head home wondering more about the data rather than the car nor the TV hihi...

But as we reached Malim Nawar, the traffic on the PLUS Highway started to slow down. We were then stuck in almost 13km traffic congestion for almost 3 hours. A trailer of some sort skidded and blocked the entire lanes heading to KL. We only reached Bukit Merah around 6 pm. And only reached Seremban by 2.00 am on the 20th September. Imagine the stress we were under, our house was recently broken into and we need to waddle the traffic which led us to spend almost 11 hours on the road to reach home. I was so mad at PLUS, I called them to give them a piece of my mind!

By the time we reached Seremban 3, we were too exhausted to actually do anything else. The UiTM Polis Bantuan had helped locked the front gate with chains and the students next door had managed to find an extra lock for the sliding doors too. We were utterly grateful for their help. Once we got both to unlock the chains and the lock, we went in nervously to assess the situation. Alhamdulillah, upon doing some preliminary rounds, we noticed that nothing else was missing, except for the car and the TV. Every thing else remained in the house, despite the fact that some of the items were hidden in plain sight.

We decided to report the matter the next day instead because we were beyond exhausted.

The followings are all the actions needed to be taken in cases of stolen cars:

Do a police report

The next morning, we draft the police report and I head to Seremban 2 IPD to file my report. Once I am done, I paid to buy the report, which cost RM2. If you ever get into such trouble in the future, please be reminded to be given the yellowish slip receipt because the Insurance Company will only considered you had an original police report if you got that yellow slip. I almost wasn't issued one. Having the report made and printed is free. However, payment must be paid to get the printed copy to be considered as an official copy. (I hope I'm making sense here)

Assist the investigating officer in his investigation

In an hour after I made the report, the Investigation Officer (IO) for my case was assigned and he dropped by my house with his photographer. He left after awhile. There's nothing much we can say nor offer him in terms of info, since we were away when it happened. A few days later another police officer did call asking about whether we've left Touch & Go Card in the car, so he could trace the car from the Toll's charge, but since we rarely use the car, no such card was left in it.

Inform the Insurance Company and file documentations

Anyway, by Monday the 21st of September, I informed the Insurance Company and 2 days later submitted all the applications forms and documents required by the company in order for me to make my claim. I am required to submit:

  1. The Original Police Report
  2. The Original Car's Registration Card (which you can give later if it's still with the bank)
  3. The Insurance Cover Note
  4. A copy of my IC and Driver's License
  5. Keys to the car (which can also be given to the adjuster)
  6. 2 copies of the JPJK3A forms (Borang Tukar Hakmilik)
Upon receiving the notification an adjuster was appointed for my case. 

Make arrangements with the adjuster

After several calls with the adjuster, we finally managed to set a date for a meeting with the adjuster on the 8th of October. The adjuster dropped by the house to interview and take my statements. They were quite a considerable of questions he kept repeating, albeit in different versions. But what I gather, he's just trying to detect if there's any fraud involved. He later snapped some photos of the 'crime scene' as part of his report to the insurance company. He also took a copy of my car's hire purchase agreement and collected the remaining set of keys to the car.

Follow up with the adjuster

I made sure to follow through with the adjuster. After a few days he reported that he had submitted my claim. He can't confirm the amount but he generally insisted that it will need to be based on the year the car was manufactured. (We learned from this experience to never buy car from the year end stock of the previous year. Although it's cheaper due to price promotion, the value will still need to be based on the previous year. For e.g. if the car manufactured in 2011, but registered in 2012 like ours, the value will need to be based on 2011, not 2012. Bummer!)

Anyway, 10 days after the interview, our adjuster issued a letter requesting the police findings' report from the Investigating Officer. I was informed if I wanted to speed things up I need to follow up the request for the report with my IO.

Follow up with the IO

Which I did, of course! Anyway, since it has always been a month and no news have been heard of the car, on the 21st of October 2015, the IO had issued a findings' report that the case will be CLOSED, and will be reopen upon findings of further info and arrests.

Submission of the police investigation's findings to the adjuster

I immediately submitted the findings of the police to the adjuster. A week later, the insurance company approved my claim. I received the necessary documentations at the end of October. Initially I was a bit disappointed with the amount. I was advised if I disagree I may opt for a different valuation from PERODUA. I did make the call, but it seems the value quoted is even lower. So I decided to just go along with the amount, considering that I don't really need to top up the amount of the remaining of my hire purchase to the bank.

Completing the final documentations for the Insurance Company

There are a few documents that the insurance company need in order to process the claim. This is where it got tricky, because the car was bought in Kedah, so the documentations need to be signed and approved or issued by the  bank in Kedah too. Bummer! So I need 2 of these documents signed and stamped by the bank:

  1. Discharge Voucher (Discharge & Subrogation Letter of the bank's and my right in the car)
  2. Redemption statement & undertaking letter from the bank (this letter stating that the bank will release the car's e-hakmilik to the insurance company once the cheque is cleared)
I need to scan and email these documents to Alor Star and they would signed & stamped everything and courier them back to the Insurance Company. I emailed them on the 5th of November, and made sure I followed up with the relevant officer. They completed everything and couriered the Insurance Company by the 13th of November. 

We received the difference of the amount paid by the Insurance Company on the 16th of December, which meant we are no longer officially responsible of PKL7*77

It actually took almost a month waiting for the claim to be cleared. In the meantime, the IO continued with their investigations. In fact, on the 4th November IO from the Seremban IPK called informing me that they have found our TV somewhere in a restaurant in Nilai. Our IO returned the TV on the 12th of November at the IPD Seremban 2.

On the 18th of January 2016, almost 4 months after we lost the car, the IO called informing that they have found the car. He confirmed whether I have received the claims, so he can returned the car to the adjuster. I confirmed all had already been processed and wondered if we can have a look at the car one final time before he returned it to the Insurance Company. He complied. So we went to see what's left of the car on the 19th of January. Nothing much was inside it, of course. Anyway, we had one last look, thank our IO and left. 

The Plate Number was taken from a motorbike's registration number
Early in February, on the 4th, I received my first ever subpoena to court for this case. I will need to be a witness on the 2nd of March at the Magistrates' court. Will later update on the outcome on another post, In Sya Allah.

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Marking Raya

The next time somebody asked me why I have put on weight?? Know that it's caused by:

1) Raya

2) Marking in the midst of Raya

There's just too much stress involved. How can one celebrate in peace, when there's just too many scripts left untouched?

She eats.


Tuesday, July 14, 2015

A Post For Ramadan

It's almost mid July & Ramadan this year is almost over. Lots have been happening. How I wish whatever that runs through my mind could self-write themselves into this blog :-)

Anyway,  there's some milestones that's worth noting and celebrating:

1) Sofiyah turns 6 months earlier this month. She can now sit unassisted, crawl, stand assisted, eat soft blended food and has 2 lower teeth coming up. She sure is trying to play catch up with her sister and brothers :-D

2) Uwais started fasting this year. Last year, he didn't even want to try. So this year, I wasn't hoping much. But he said he wants to do it, so I let him be. It was difficult the first few days and some days in between but he made it through. He'd also started performing his Solah regularly now, and hopefully it will continue on past this month In Sya Allah.

3) I have tried to cook almost every day for Ramadan. It's very exhausting, even if the dishes were rather simple or even over simplified. Adding to that exhaustion, things at work that has been rather hectic due to the transitioning post. At the moment I am still marking exam scrips. The dateline is just a few days after raya. So definitely no raya for me this year.

4) In fact, there's this one thing I really feel this year, the lost of any much desire to celebrate raya like it used to be. Probably because my grandparents is no longer doing so well health wise. Probably because I think I'm getting rather too old for this. Maybe because I find the "excessiveness" of raya celebrated in Malaysia rather distasteful. I don't know. Maybe there's just too many things on my mind. I just wanna have the day come and life goes back as usual (as if it has always been usual). But I know it's not going to happen.  There will be a minimum of at least 3 other functions in conjunction with raya. Not that it's a bad thing. But it does take much time away from all the other important stuff needing attention. Oh well, let's just enjoy all the varieties & abundance of food.

Selamat Menyambut Aidilfitri everyone

Maaf zahir dan batin

If that really means anything

But I meant it :-)

Take care & Stay safe!

Monday, June 15, 2015

Catching up with Sofiyah :-)

Up till last weekend, most people who rely solely on certain social media to connect with me doesn't really know I have a new child.

It's alright, though, because personally, it was rather intended - partly that is. Yes, I had wanted to keep Sofiyah out of the 'limelight' for awhile, but mostly it was due to the fact that I no longer have the luxury of time to sit idly to write about her or life in general.

She is growing up so fast, I am barely catching up with her, what more to write about it. So I spent my days watching her antics and enjoying her as my baby. Last time I looked it was January, but now it's June, and in 6 months time she will be a year old. 

Last weekend we had her Aqiqah with the rest of her cousins, and this week she had started propping herself up to sit. It feels just like yesterday that she was a month's old. When I told some friends, how I am slightly sad by her speedy ability to reach her developmental milestones, they almost don't get it. I am happy and grateful that she's the healthy, bumbling, chubby baby that she is, but I am wary I won't remember how she felt in my arms when I first brought her home, I won't remember how it felt like to watch her sleeping like a wonderful baby that she is, I won't remember how she first smelt, the smell of heaven, people say. I am sad, because this - this meeting with this beautiful created soul, will never come again. Time will pass and I know I will not be able to remember them all, so I wanted to savour all that I could now, while it last. I turned 38 this year, and I doubt I will be given another chance like this. So Alhamdulillah, what matters now is just seeing to her care & needs.

Sofiyah with Kakak Aliyah :-)
Yes, she looked different from Aliyah. She carry her own looks hihi...
Uwais adore her to the max, oh well! everyone does :-D

Cheeky Sofiyah ;-)

All 2015 babies, Sofiyah (Jan), Bashirah (Mac) & Zahin (May) :-D

We also celebrated my youngest brother's wedding :-)

She is in competition with work at times, but most times, I couldn't care less what happens at work. When I'm home or when I decided a line is to be drawn between my life and my job, she wins all the time. Truthfully, my job is part of my life, and my life is my family and my job. Their interconnection is, most of the time, fine with me, and I bet for the children too. The children tag along to work sometimes, experiencing life in campus as I have always wanted, watching me tutor or lecture or spent time rummaging through my office. My colleagues even babysit the baby and the children a couple of times, so everything is fine, In Sya Allah.

I moved into my new office this week. New post, new challenges. (Can you spot my 'Ferrari' out the window? :-P) 

All I need and have always needed is a little more patience, not only with everyone, but also with myself :-) Please keep all of us is your prayers...I will try to do the same. It's the very least I could do, sometimes. Some other times, I'd try to do a little bit more. In Sya Allah :-)

A/T: My "chalazion" decided to go away by itself. Took a while. This week it's really cleared. Alhamdulillah. Thank you too to anyone that prayed for me. Haha I've been going around asking everyone I assisted, to help pray for my eye.  

Friday, May 22, 2015

Life as it is: A Running Update

Introducing...My new girlfriend :-D  

Come 1st June, I will let go of my LA position for my campus. It's actually very relieving. I find the position which was designed to fill a specific portfolio for the campus rather daunting. But what made it worst for me is, being in a portfolio where I could do the least amount of change. I'd rather teach and work with students instead.

But why bother now. Let's just move on. I am taking over another portfolio which, I find much more suitable for my talents. There's just too many things needed to be completed these past couple of weeks to catch up with the workloads of this position.

For awhile now I have been lobbying for more law lecturers from the authorities all over the UiTM system. Alhamdulillah, my application was considered justified & 2 more lecturers will be made available to serve the law department by the end of the year In Sya Allah.

A Legal Unit is also in the pipeline & the proposal is slotted to be presented next week. The Boss is happy with the idea & my team has help me draft an excellent working paper and I hope by next week the unit will be up & running officially. In fact, today the unit has already started one of its activities, discussing our MOU for the University with Zakat NS. I hope the MOU will be signed come Syawal this year. I am confident the unit will have a great impact for the university with many more activities being planned in the near future.

Running here & there with 14 hours of class still tagged to my workload is not an easy task though. It's very tiring actually. Next week, is another full week. On Thursday alone, I have 4 functions running at the same time. Craaazzzyyy!!! Ok, whatever.  I will split myself into 4, then :-P

On top of that my right eyelid is suffering from chalazion. It's not painful or anything, just annoying. I am still hoping it will go away on its own, or else I'd need to schedule a minor surgery. Funny thing is, I don't even have time to just stand around, what more to schedule an eye surgery. 

Anyway, in the meantime my baby girl is now in her fifth month. Happy & cool girl she is. I told my team, sometimes over and over, when in doubt, always choose your family first. Everything else will follow through, In Sya Allah. So I'm really happy going home, and no longer care to work at home no more. Too tired anyway. Better watch my baby grow. I also told them, when you're not well, then take care of yourself first. Other things or other people can wait. Maybe I should take my own advice and work out some time to head to the hospital soon huhuhu

A/T: Aliyah turned 11 today, ;-) Alhamdulillah :-D

Sunday, April 26, 2015


So it's proven.
You're a bully.
Low self esteem.
So you turned a bully.
So that it makes you feel adequate.
So that it makes you feel superior.
So that it makes you feel complete.
But you know that's all lies.
It doesn't matter, because no matter how hard you try, it's all an illusion.
You'll never feel adequate, superior or complete by being a bully.
I feel bad for you.
I feel sorry for you.
But it doesn't change the fact how pathetic you are.
Don't you dare tell me how to do my work, when you don't even know how to do yours properly.
When I said properly, I meant proper, proper so as not to step on other people's rights but done appropriately anyway.
You're such a conflicting soul.
How can you claim to follow rules you, yourself, never abide too?
How can you claim the moral high ground when you, yourself is a serial liar?
In the end you are just a big fat lying bully.
All the best getting your way in the future!
May it never entails mine ever again.

Thursday, April 9, 2015


Sebenarnya nak luahkan yang terbuku di hati bab-bab kerja. Kalau ditulis mahunya sakit ibu jari, sbb usually draft mesti dalam notes telefon bimbit. Tapi passion nak marah-marah ni selalunya akan pudar cepat sungguh la ni. Aku ni kalau marah, free flowing jer semua ayat. Bila dah reda dan redho, semuanya hilang. haha lawak jugak tu kdg2. Aku tahu, aku dah tua, tu sbb malas nak marah2, fikir2, sibuk2 dah. Kelmarin bila my DH tanya pasal nak isi apa tah "eh, you bla...bla...bla 36 tahun". then I looked up and cantas him "eh, I dah nak 40 lar, tak lama lagi!" "Ohh ye" kata dia. Yes! I will be 40 soon enough. Although it makes no difference, since I have felt like 40 for so long pun. Now tinggal nak reach the numbers in reality jer hihi...

Kdg2 duduk sorang2 terfikir, kalau mati nanti adakah org yang terkesan dgn aku selama hayat aku ni? Bergunakah aku ni atau sekadar menyusahkan shj? Aku tahu masih byk aku perlu lakukan. I feel I am not worthy of the time and convenience given to me. There's just too much I need to do and I haven't got the chance to do it yet. But life is unpredictable, we never know what awaits us tomorrow.

But for now, I really want to see Morocco. I promised myself I will be there before the end of 2016, In Sya Allah. Now, I must find a way to get myself there! :-D


Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Halatuju UiTM di hatiku kah?

As I sat down on the floor, facing my new bookshelves, I wonder what is it I've been doing for the past 2 years in UiTM. It's like the past 2 years had slipped through my fingers like a fist full of sand. I have nothing to show for the passing months. It's hateable, annoying, pathetic.
It's me without any halatuju.

People would say - come on, you're in the line of business where you're educating the younger generation. What better halatuju do you want or need??

Well, that's part of it. Part of a bigger aim. But the halatuju I'm referring to is more of something to improve myself. Some action I need to take to do something I like and am passionate about in my line of work. The thing is however, sometimes I know what it is that I like and am passionate about, some other times, I am not too sure.

UiTM is a working zone that makes me think, making me wondering of my worth, making me reconsidering my priorities. It's overwhelming most times, but at other times, I feel rather numb. UiTM is not a place of contrast, it usually tries to do what it aims to do. But as of late it tends to do so in such a 'rushed' manner, that made you want to feel sorry for yourself and the students. 

True education cannot be rushed, it needs to be 'felt' before it reaches ones' heart and soul or else we'll just end up with mere graduates who hold dated-stamped papers. The truth is I've grown very fond of UiTM and to see myself with no halatuju in a uni that have a somewhat 'missed opportunity' halatuju, is sad and disappointing. I have high hopes for UiTM. I know we can do and be so much better. I know it can be done. But as we continue sailing through, while waiting for the winds to change course, I wonder if most would be as patient to stay on course, the current course. Despite most who sing their hearts out everytime the song 'UiTM di hatiku' is being played, the numbers who opted to go off course, escalate. 

As for myself, I need to get back on, first - by finding my halatuju...

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

How to buy a Sub-sale Property in Malaysia: Things to consider in an industry of vampires & vultures!

Nope, I'm not writing the fourth sequel to the Twilight saga, where Bella & Edward decide to get a new house in Seremban :-P. The truth is, I had never read the series nor watch the movies. But what I went through recently in dealing with property sale transactions remind me of all these blood-sucking creatures, and there are lots of them in Twilight, I heard ;-) Actually, in our current 'capitalist'-controlled economy, these creatures roam the world and somehow or another we got sucked involuntarily into a system they created purposely. How ironic!

Anyway, for those who have yet to get where I'm heading with this post, let's just recap with an overview haha...Alright, after almost 13 years living in Sg Petani, while working in Merbok, we've finally made the move &got transferred to Seremban in May last year. We sold our double storey 4 bedroom house in Bandar Laguna Merbok, SP at the end of April and the transaction got finalised sometime in early November.

Let me highlight to all of you the "Pros & Cons in a sub-sale":

1) When will you receive the money in a sub-sale property transactions?

I've always thought that buying a house was sengsara enough, but rupa-rupanya waiting for your money when selling is even worst. You see, when you buy a house in a sub-sale transaction, you got a house almost immediately, but when you are selling your house, you're letting go of your property, but you'll only received your money 4-6 months down the road. This actually throws off most of our financial arrangements because we need to finance another place in Seremban.

2) Finding out the value of a property & what it meant in a sub-sale?

Finding & funding a property in Seremban was initially rather daunting. We don't know where to start, which area to focus on and we've also found out that whilst banks will fund up to 90% of the price of a property you bought direct from housing developers (subject to your current liability), they will only fund 90% of the value of a certain property in a sub sale transaction, i.e. when you buy from a third party. 

What's the difference you ask? 

Let say, a house from a developer is being sold at RM100k, banks will finance RM90k out of it. However, if you were to buy a property from another individual, who's selling at the same price, banks require a property valuation report and will only finance 90% of the value of the property. If the value reported is RM100k or more then you'll be fine. In contrast, if it's of a lesser value, say RM50k, then you'll only be financed for 90% from the RM50k, instead of the selling price of RM100k. So you'll only receive financing of RM45k & if you still want the property you'll have to korek money from elsewhere to settle the difference, not including the cost for lawyers, valuers, bankers & insurers. That's basically what happened to us in Seremban. We found out the hard way that a sub sale of property in Seremban can be disastrous to finance. The 'real' value of most properties in Seremban is way lower than the ones in Sg Petani. I'm rather surprised, because Seremban is the state capital (in comparison to SP, which is not). No wonder most private sale & purchase have difficulty going through. Imagine needing to top up the difference of up to hundreds of thousands in some case.

3) Finding out the difference in loan entitlements' banks are willing to grant & what that difference meant to you in a sub-sale?

So now we definitely know that there's a cekik darah difference between the pricing of properties being offered by housing developers and the real value of those properties. Developers' pricing calculation, somehow, somewhat have included a future (of up to maybe 10 years) appreciation in value. Meaning in reality, you are paying a future profit to them, NOW! Coupled that with the fact that when you are financed by banks (who've made a 'pact' with developers by having the above mentioned policy of financing up to 90%), for the first 10 years you are only paying interests/profits to the bank. Your loan principal will only start reducing halfway through the loan term. So really, REALLY we're being sucked out dry by these vampires & vultures. They have put in place a system that do exactly that! Screw us! Suck us all of our hard earned money! 

But most times, we all have no choice. We need to serve these 'warlords' because we need a place to stay. And they say it's good for the economy, and they say house is a good investment, and they say so many other things. But truthfully, most of us is only so glad that we have a place to stay, a place to call home. We don't go roaming the earth thinking of the economy or the future value of our home on a daily basis. Further, what's the point of having a million ringgit valued house if you can't or won't be able to sell it anyway.

4) Why in the end we succumb to the cutthroat system?

We have no choice. We cannot rent forever, because of the sheer number of stuff we have. Plus, we don't want to be transferring here & there anymore. Kesian anak2, kesian badan sendiri. We found a perfectly located single storey 4 bedroom house - 2-5 minutes drive to the office, school & shops, but it's smaller than our place in SP. It's in a sold out new development area and somehow or another, one guy wanted to let go of his place even before the keys are being released. The price he quoted was exorbitant considering its size and the value is so much lower, even lower than the developer's initial selling price, regardless of the house being so close to UiTM. And being a sub-sale, we'd need to top up the difference before the sale could be concluded. With money from our house sale in SP still stucked, we scrambled elsewhere to make up the difference. So stressful.

Alhamdulillah, in the end we signed the S&P for the house in June and it was settled by October. We moved in early September & up till today, we're still sorting most of our stuff. There's just too many books, hundreds of them huhuhu... And of course, we had some delays with the cabinet makers. Oh well, kisah masuk rumah dan rupa parasnya will take up another posting soon.
So in conclusion these 4 points seriously need consideration if you were to buy a property through a sub-sale transactions. With proper financial management you'll pull through, or else you'll have to reconsider or choose to wait a little while longer before finally owning a house of your own.

My humble abode's living area in S3, 
finally, after 5 months of sorting...